Another baby...hmmm....

Okay...it hit me today that there's going to be another child in this house. Specifically, to start out with, a baby. Wow. Don't know why it hit me all of a sudden. I was out gathering some things for daycare at Tarjay and it just kind of hit me. And I feel so incredibly lucky! Honestly, those who have children and/or want children probably know what I mean. After having one I can't imagine how life was before him. Weird how that happens. We spent lots of years without a child. But now my child is crucial to my very existence.

I'm so looking forward to seeing Boo as a big brother. Part of me wants a boy so that I can do the children's room in a really fun, boy design as opposed to gender neutral. And I think brothers have a special bond. I think it'd be neat to have two boys pretty close in age. BUT I have lots of reasons for wanting a girl too. So, in the end, I'll be happy with what I get!

You know, I'm glad to be a work at home mom. There's days when I'm frustrated with it and I tend to get down about the fact that my college degree is no more useful to me than a roll of toilet paper. But I have to keeep in mind, that's for the moment. Years from now when my kids are grown I'll still have my Bachelor's degree to build on. I remember watching a show - I believe it was Oprah (speak of the devil, see below...lol) and she had women on there who had chosen to pursue careers and then have children. What happened with these women is that they waited and when they were ready to try for children, their bodies wouldn't do it. Fertility isn't an exact science. Some women can have children into their forties and for some women mid 30's was too late (as on the show that I saw). It made me sad to watch. And you know, every single woman on the show said she'd give up her career in a heartbeat if she could have children. That show always kind of stuck with me. I guess it's because it was clear how painful this felt to these women and I didn't want to make that mistake.

Many of you know that I started a PsyD program (Doctorate in Clinical Psychology). I left the program after a year. That was a very, very hard thing for me to do. I loved the program and was doing well in it (4.0 if I can toot my own horn for a second). But I felt conflicted the entire time. I was taking on sooo much student debt (and it was a 5 year program) that I knew I'd have to work nonstop when I was done in order to pay back my student loans. I knew that this would probably conflict with my desire to be home with my children. So, after a year in the program, I left. I don't regret the choice to go to school. I would've had a huge regret if I hadn't enrolled in the program. I guess I needed that experience. I do absolutely want a career someday. The crazy part? I've realized that absolutely, no way in hell do I want to sit and listen to people's problems all day long for a job. I've got enough crap in my own life to deal with...lol!

I've got an idea or two on the backburner for when our children are older (all of them at least late elementary) and I decide to pursue more education. My biggest idea is Certified Professional Midwife. Not all states license them - the one I live in currently doesn't. It could change by then, but we plan to move anyways at some point. So, that's a requirement for me for wherever we move - that it must be a state that allows CPMs to practice.

Anyways, just something I was thinking about while shopping at Target. Yes, this is what the inside of my head is like. It's nonstop all day long - just contemplating crap. This is why I need so many blogs!

Your Thoughts?

A friend posted this on my facebook wall awhile back. I'm curious what others think of this video. Here's my initial impressions.

I disagree with Oprah's religious views. I am a christian and for that reason believing in Jesus Christ is central to my faith. I do believe that God is with me, ie...I have a relationship with God, etc...However, I do not believe that I am a part of God - as in deity myself. It's a fine line, but for me it's an important one.

However, I do think this video is bordering on fear mongering a bit. I think that christian organizations have a tendency to find popular people, beliefs, ideas to villianize and then make a crusade out of it. I think we'd all be better off if we promoted what Jesus was about instead of attacking what he's not. Does anyone see the point I'm trying to make? Yes, Oprah is influential. But if weren't Oprah, it'd be someone else. And we as individuals are responsible for choosing what we believe. So I guess it seems inappropriate to me to dump on someone because others choose to follow them. To me that seems similar to blaming a particular music or genre for a teenager going on a shooting spree at his high school. Clearly, that teenager's choice was a bit more complex than that. In the same way I don't believe we can blame a popular figure because people choose to follow them. And Oprah is a person with the right to believe what she wants to believe also. So...I guess I'm just not understanding where this video is coming from in making her out to be the villian.

Okay...that's my two cents. Anyone else?

Welcome

I now have a blog that is more of an appropriate place for some of my more "rambly" posts. And yes, I'm allowed to make up words here! I feel that my original blog is getting weighed down by random stuff that doesn't fit the intent of the initial blog. My hope for this blog is to have a place where discussion can happen in a respectful manner. I have all kinds of philosophical, spiritual, and downright silly thoughts floating around in my head that I'd like to get out. So this will be the place for that.

I want people to comment here. But hopefully if there's disagreement on something, points can be made respectfully.